Come on in. Watch us fight.

When Corinn and I were first married we could have some pretty big arguments.

Our first argument, in fact, came about because of expired eggs and resulted in me taking everything out of the refrigerator and throwing it into the trash can. The argument ended after I threw a slim package of ham in her general direction and, after realizing the absurdity of the scene, we both laughed at our momentary loss of sanity.

We’ve matured since then. Mostly.

But there was a time when our friends didn’t like to be around us because we’d start arguing.

How does this apply to church marketing?

Don’t invite someone into your dysfunction. 

If your church is going through a rough time — you’re in a frustrating and heated transition of some sort, or you’re on the verge of a split — don’t invite someone to come in and watch you fight.

Don’t invite someone to your “family friendly church” and subject them to small pockets of people whispering and complaining about the petty issue du jour.

It’s uncomfortable for all involved. You’ll be embarrassed. The visitors won’t come back. And then the rumors will start about the First Christian Church of Chaos.

I’ve been blessed to not experience this on a grand level, but I’ve heard horror stories about churches involved in disastrous strife. It’s not good. It doesn’t help the cause of Christ. And it doesn’t meet the needs of the person who longs to be part of a loving church family.

If this is your church, do all involved a favor and take time to heal. I don’t exactly know what that looks like, but there are counselors and pastors and people out there who can guide you through that. I’m writing strictly from a church marketing perspective that says it’s not a good situation put on display to visitors.

So, please, do what you need to do to heal. And once you’re back, and the fighting has stopped, and God is at the center again, then it’s okay to open the doors and welcome people in.

Has your church ever dealt with this type of situation? What steps did the church take to heal?


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